August 09, 2016

Mind Games

Lately, a number of people with strong spirits of intimidation, provocation and manipulation sought me out. I wondered why they tried to attach themselves to me. How would they benefit from controlling my soul? What was the ultimate purpose?

I noticed several similarities during these encounters. They all used words to try to instill fear, do emotional harm, and manipulate to impose their will. If I did not acquiesce, I was met with extreme anger. No. Rage would be a more appropriate description of their response to my resistance to being their puppet. 

Another thing they shared was an unrelenting attempt to keep me on the defensive. They did something wrong, but when challenged to take responsibility, quickly placed blame on the one they wronged.

I thought, "They are crazy." I am not speaking of the mentally ill. I have compassion for those who battle this disease. I am talking about people whose perspectives are so twisted, they are blind to their own truth. People who repeatedly ask you to hand them a knife, use it to stab you, then say, "Look what you made me do." 

Bewilderment  was my first response-  then came indignation. The audacity! "Keep your mind games. Quell your constant need to control. I see your efforts to manipulate. You've exposed yourself - like Madea - standing behind the screen door asking, 'You can see me?'  Yes! I see you!"

"You have come to the wrong individual. I am not the person you used to know. My spirit is strong against your attacks, yet my heart feels compassion. I wish you knew what you were missing. I wish you could understand. A life that is not whole is no life at all - and you are not whole."

I pray for you, but have no problem steering clear of individuals and environments which seek to infect my soul. I am soaring now - in this new season of my life. My spirit is free, and it feels good. 

June 06, 2016

Built to Last

Forest Gump said, "Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get." That may be, but you have what it takes to handle whatever comes.

In this season of life I am more aware of the many facets God has used to fashion me. When He shaped Thea -  vulnerability, focus, kindness, and a brazen resolve to never give up - were securely stitched into the fabric of my soul. Complementing them are brokenness, and scars of varying hurts that have since healed. I occasionally touch each one to remind myself of just how fragile yet strong I am. Sometimes new wounds appear, and I go through the process of healing again - emerging more resilient at the end.

Every day can be a celebration - of a lesson learned through loss, a victory won through conquest or simply the beauty of having the will to push beyond resounding defeat. The key is to get up, determined to make the most of what you have been given. And on this journey called life - you will rise again and again - not because you like the battle, but because you're built to last.