Wounded in the House of Friends

Zechariah 13:6 exposes an issue which honestly causes me distress when I consider it carefully. A prophet is asked, "What are these wounds in thine hands?" He replies, "Those with which I was wounded in the house of my friends." Use of the possessive, my, reveals the extent of pain in his pronouncement.

Friends love and are loved. They're trusted. There is an expectation of absolute loyalty. It is difficult to acknowledge, my friend hurt me. We know what to do with physical wounds. Certainly clean, apply ointment, bandage and give them time to heal. Do everything possible to avoid infection. Emotional pain is tough. How do we deal with a heart that is broken by someone we've allowed to touch it?

Think about this for a moment. Judas likely spent every waking moment with Jesus. They ate together. Christ washed his feet, yet, he betrayed Him with a kiss, to people who would kill Him (Luke 22). The betrayal was expected but painful anyway. Tamar never saw hers coming. She was raped by her brother Amnon when he deceived her into a compromising position by pretending to be ill. Afterwards, he put her out and locked the door (2 Samuel 13). Finally, King David's son, Absalom, conspired and took the throne from him. David ran to avoid being killed by his child (2 Samuel 15-19). Each scenario was an emotional minefield, and responses varied. Jesus surrendered and was tortured and killed. Tamar withdrew and became desolate, beyond redemption. David's heart was broken, but he fought to regain his throne. I am not sure how I would have reacted in any of these situations. 

A thirteen-year-old (I will call her Sheila) whose arms were covered in cigarette burns confessed that she put fire on her skin when the hurt in her heart was too much to bear. The physical pain momentarily dulled emotional trauma. I've been thinking of this because I feel an urgency to survive and properly manage painful processes. In my reflections on the matter, one thing is certain. If I focus on the wound, I will never get beyond it. To what then should I give the most energy? I decided, when my eyes are fixed on healing, that's what I'll move towards. 

Friendly fire is horrible and can be fatal if after care is not thoughtful. It requires a commitment to focus on healing although you are in pain. Be honest about what you are going through. You will need a support system (preferably a small but strong one) because there are times when they will have to hold you together until you can stand on your own. You address issues of the heart well when you also deal with your mental and spiritual state. If the mind and spirit are aligned, you are better positioned to handle the emotional roller coaster. 

Pray. Read the Psalms for examples of how David talked to God during his process. Forgive. It doesn't mean staying in relationship with those who have hurt you but forgiving allows you to let go. Letting go helps with healing. No matter the challenge, you can do this. You are not alone, and I am praying for you.

Bring Back Our Girls

I find myself consciously seeking to subdue my emotions on the issue of hundreds of Nigerian school girls kidnapped, to be used as pawns to manipulate and control. I care deeply, intensely, and it is difficult to conceptualize or accept this truth. It horrifies me, but it has happened.

They were snatched away from all things familiar, safety now a memory - pulled from expressions of love and care into terrifying situations. It is too much to bear. My heart weeps with the mother's and bleeds with the father's. The images that plague their minds are likely ones of terror. They have seen the nature of the captors. They know the possible fates their offspring face.

I cannot imagine what their days are like. Is sleeplessness and constant worry now the new reality? Do daunting feelings of utter hopelessness and anguish drape the landscape of their thoughts? That state of being is now the common thread, a link between the girls and their families, Nigeria and the world – worry, concern, fear, apprehension, doubt - pain.

The Nigerian people expect the government to do more. In their eyes (on this matter) it is an impotent institution. Maybe the country’s elect feel as powerless. It is possible what is viewed as ineptitude is their stark truth, “we are not equipped to handle this.” I could be wrong, it could be something else altogether. What I do know with certainty, those girls deserve their freedom. I am praying for their safe return. Bring back our girls.

Never Give Up On Your Dream

"It's not a sprint, it's a marathon." Those were powerful words from literary agent, Leslie Stobbe. He was talking about the process of writing and publishing. His words revitalized my resolve to continue working with optimism. Writers write, no matter the challenge. Words pour out unbidden. Empty pages are filled over time.

For many new writers, writing is not the difficult part, it is the process to publication that they find daunting. Some become discouraged, some choose to self-publish. Others are swallowed up by the marketing maze. It is great to know that there are events with resources and direct communication with many in the industry who are willing to share much needed information.

Leslie Stobbe was one of the presenters at the Florida Writers Association's Mini-Conference. He has a wealth of information both about writing and publishing. His recounted experiences were enlightening. The final speaker at the conference was Davis Bunn. I believe he inspired us all. The man wrote six novels before he had one published - six! His passion and purpose sustained the gift and kept it thriving until the world was ready for it. He is a man living his life's purpose.

One key thing he revealed was that you should not allow yourself to be defined by failure. He saw failure as just an event, an opportunity to take the criticism received to refine his craft. Today, he is an award winning, best selling author. If failure had defined him, there would not have been a seventh novel. His experience gives H-O-P-E.

Never give up on your dreams. You keep your dream alive by living it. Keep moving towards the goal. If you do, one day you too will have success. For more information about Mr. Stobbe, Mr. Bunn or the Florida Writers Association use the links below.

http://stobbeliterary.com/
http://www.davisbunn.com/profile.htm
http://www.floridawriters.net/